joeypecoraro's Journal [entries|friends|calendar] joeypecoraro userinfo friends add entries ... [ userinfo | livejournal userinfo ] [ calendar | livejournal calendar ]

[March 23, 2008] wanted: single f under 33 must enjoy the sun must enjoy the sea sought by single m mrs destiny send photo to address is it you and me? reply to single m: my name is caroline cell phone number here call if you have the time 28 and bored grieving over loss sorry to be heavy but heavy is the cost heavy is the cost reply to caroline: thanks so much for response these things can be scary not always what you want how about a drink? this ancient club at noon i'll phone you first i guess i hope i see you soon i never got your name i assume you're 33 your voice it sounded kind i hope that you like me when you see my face i hope that you don't laugh i'm not a film star beauty i'll send a photograph i hope that you don't laugh not to single m: why did you not show up? i waited for an hour i finally gave up i thought once that i saw you i thought that you saw me i guess we'll never meet now it wasn't meant to be it wasn't mean to be i was sure you saw me but it wasn't meant to be wanted: single f under 33 must enjoy the sun must enjoy the sea sought by single m nothing too heavy send photo to address is it you or me? is it you or me? is it you or me? is it you or me? reply

[March 09, 2008] The other night dear, as I lay sleeping I dreamed I held you in my arms But when I awoke, dear, I was mistaken So I hung my head and I cried. You are my sunshine, my only sunshine You make me happy when skies are gray You'll never know dear, how much I love you Please don't take my sunshine away I'll always love you and make you happy, If you will only say the same. But if you leave me and love another, You'll regret it all some day: You are my sunshine, my only sunshine You make me happy when skies are gray You'll never know dear, how much I love you Please don't take my sunshine away You told me once, dear, you really loved me And no one else could come between. But not you've left me and love another; You have shattered all of my dreams: You are my sunshine, my only sunshine You make me happy when skies are gray You'll never know dear, how much I love you Please don't take my sunshine away In all my dreams, dear, you seem to leave me When I awake my poor heart pains. So when you come back and make me happy I'll forgive you dear, I'll take all the blame. You are my sunshine, my only sunshine You make me happy when skies are gray You'll never know dear, how much I love you Please don't take my sunshine away reply

[December 01, 2007] i'll post after i tell sarah. i'm happy. reply

[November 27, 2007] "Eventually you’re left with a decision to make. You can either let the past ruin every solid thing you’ve ever held on to. Or you can stop letting the past follow you, and instead let it influence who you are." reply

[November 19, 2007] going to connecticut and new york with emily wednesday - saturday. i'm excited! reply

[November 15, 2007] "Trying to vent some of the terrible passion That's coursing through me Something about you Something about spending the afternoon asleep in your arms I hate you, fucker." reply

[November 03, 2007] get out of my head. you're everwhere i look...even when my eyes are closed. reply

[October 13, 2007] speeding motorcycle, wont you change me? in a world of funny changes, speeding motorcycle, wont you change me? speeding motorcycle, of my heart. speeding motorcycle, always changing me. speeding motorcycle, dont you drive wrecklessly. speeding motorcycle, of my heart. speeding motorcycle, of my heart. speeding motorcycle, lets be smart. because we dont want a wreck. we can do alot of tricks. we dont have to break our legs to get our kicks. speeding motorcycle, the road is ours. speeding motorcycle, lets speed some more. speeding motorcycle, theres nothing you can do. speeding motorcycle, i love you. speeding motorcycle, lets just go. 4/ read reply

[July 31, 2007] I LOVE YOU TOO reply

[July 21, 2007] advice would be much appreciated. 1/ read reply

[July 11, 2007] UPDOWNUPDOWNUPDOWNUPDOWNUPDOWNUPDOWNUPDOWNUPDOWN reply

[July 05, 2007] You wanted to know the worst about me, the things I told no one and hid below the surface. How do I explain it? How do I explain who I am when I am not even sure of it myself? How do I put into words the worst parts of me that I have run from for so long? I will tell you my secrets, I will tell you everything. Maybe it will help me. Maybe you will hate me for it or maybe you will understand. I don't know, but I am sick of running. So here it is, I will give you what you want. I hate you. That is not true, but sometimes I think it is. I will not answer the phone when you call, even though I want to talk to you. I will not call you, even though it is all I want to do. I will not reach out to you, even though every part of me wants to. I will be mad at you, I will want to hurt you, I will drive you away because I am afraid to let you closer. I need your constant attention, your reassurances, but I will greet them with cold indifference. I will be jealous of the attention you give others, and I will get mad at you for ignoring me. I will feel close to you and care for you one day, only to be mad and want you out of my life the next. I am an emotional amnesiac, maybe I always have been. I take each event, each day, each conversation as a separate event, always looking for signs that you might hurt me. When I feel neglected, I will get mad and forget that the day before you told me how much you cared. I am an inconsistent mess. There is a part of me who is happy and confident and another part that is insecure and needy. These days, I never know which one it will be. Every time I think I am in control, that I know you care and I feel comfortable with our relationship, the fear and doubt will come back. Maybe with time it will go away completely, but doubt it. All it will take is another close relationship, another new friend, another day and it will be back. You ask what you can do and I do not know what to say. The needy part of me wants your constant attention, it needs your words and thoughts, your presence. But I know that is not the answer, I must accept the limitations on our relationship. The scared part of me wants you out of my life because it would be easier. The hateful part of me wants to hurt you because it thinks you have hurt me. All I can ask you to do is to understand, to not give up. I will ignore you at times, I may be rude to you, I may try to hurt you. I may hide from you and wait for you to reach out to me, so I know you will care. It is not fair to do these things, but I will. I cannot ask you to put up with this, it is not fair and no matter how I act, I care too much to put you through this. But you asked, and this is all I have to tell you. reply

[July 04, 2007] three more days. i think making a wristband out of a sock to be reminded is kind of pathetic, but i haven't truely broken down yet. only three more days. i'm so excited. three more days. reply

[May 22, 2007] i'm careful not to wake you, fearing conversation. it's better just to hold you, and keep you pacified. *** but i believe in you so much, i could die for the words that you say. but i believe in you so much, i could die from the words that you say. reply

[May 05, 2007] "don't follow your heart cause it just seems to get in your way." 1/ read reply

[April 27, 2007] i carry your heart with me(i carry it in my heart)i am never without it(anywhere i go you go,my dear; and whatever is done by only me is your doing,my darling) i fear no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true) and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant and whatever a sun will always sing is you here is the deepest secret nobody knows (here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky and a tree called life; which grows higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide) and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart) reply

[April 27, 2007] random public posts, mostly friend's only, some family only. reply

navigation [ viewing | most recent entries ]